Cruising with Kids/Shipping out with the Teens!

This is a great article on Cruising with Teens from the Miami Herald, it really covers the subject well.

It was one of those rare, perfect moments:

My husband, Paul, and I were stretched out in lounge chairs on the ship's deck, holding hands under a star-lit sky, a bag of popcorn between us. (Well, maybe our hands were touching while in the popcorn bag, but still!)

On the Jumbo-tron, one of our boys, Connor, 16, was whaling away on a faux Guitar Hero guitar and looking like a baby rock star. Next up was Jarrett, 14, waiting for his moment to be a guitar god.

And it hit me: Everybody was having fun. At the same time! On vacation!

I flashed back to other vacations: My husband and I, begging our teenagers to get out of bed and hit a museum, or trying to entice them to do some sightseeing. (``But, Mom, it's London! It'll be here tomorrow!'')

Finally, we'd found a vacation that two relaxation-deprived adults and two action-craving teenagers could enjoy.

Aboard a cruise ship, we could find the right balance of togetherness and privacy. Everybody could get up late (them) or early (us) without worrying about schedules or transportation. We'd go to sleep and wake up someplace new and fun.

Our only plan, on days in port, was to get out and play -- maybe go snorkeling or hike in a rain forest -- excursions the boys had selected, so they'd be keen to participate.

And if, come nightfall, they chose to hang in the teen center, it was fine with us. We had nightclubs to visit.

We thought we'd never go on one of those giant cruise ships with our kids, but when we did, it turned out to be our best vacation ever.

Here's our advice for making a family cruise fabulous:

• Match the cruise to the kids (rock walls and surfing and hot tubs, oh my!) Pizza and ice cream, 24/7. Loads of other kids. Freedom.

These ships are great for kids who like to socialize. They also offer sporty shore excursions with lots of teen appeal. Our boys were concerned that they'd be too cool for the cruise line's teen activities. Connor and Jarrett had had enough of ''lame'' teen programs offered at resorts. At the mere mention of this, Jarrett hooted, ``Ooh, boy! Let's decorate a T-shirt!''

At many places we've stayed, little kids get star treatment, while teens get a basketball hoop and an obsolete video game. Not on these ships.

On the Crown Princess, the teen center is big, and done up like your teen's Dream Living Room, with gaming consoles, air hockey, a teens-only hot tub and pool deck. (You don't want to share the hot tub or pool deck with them, anyway. They look 'way better in their swimsuits than you do. Who needs that?)

NCL's Norwegian Gem offers the Leopard Lounge for teens, with plasma TVs, a dance floor, a climbing wall, and a (very groovy) four-lane, 10-pin bowling alley.

Carnival is introducing aqua parks on their Fantasy-class ships, featuring four-deck-high twister waterslides and 82-foot-long racing waterslides -- great for kids who'd rather not get out of the pool. Ever.

Royal Caribbean's newest and largest ships, Freedom of the Seas and Liberty of the Seas, offer surfing. Some of Royal Caribbean's larger ships have ice-skating rinks. Rock walls seem to be de rigueur these days. And the activity-of-the-moment seems to be Wii games competitions, with mammoth screens so that everybody can watch the action.

(Parents: Please resist the temptation to ''Dance with the Stars'' on the big screen. All the coolness points you've gained by taking your teens on this trip will vanish in one bad boogie moment.)

Aboard the Crown Princess, the organized activities for teens really got rolling at 9 p.m. or so, with many of these designed to break the ice, like karaoke, talent shows and a goofy take on the Dating Game. Makeovers, sports tourneys, and a bank of video games quickly attracted hordes of kids.

Our boys loved it -- too well, we discovered by the end of Day Two, when we realized we'd barely seen them. That's when we decided to . . .

• Schedule face-time with the kids. On days at sea, you won't see them much. Your teens will likely choose to sleep in, roll out of bed for a late (huge) lunch at the buffet, and head to the teen center or the pool.

How to get some face-time with them? Plan a time to touch base each day and make them stick to it. We had dinner every night with Connor and Jarrett, always at the same time, so they couldn't ditch us and claim ignorance.

Surprisingly, the boys were happy to accompany us to the ship's entertainment venues, so we saw plenty of comedians (with PG-13-rated material), a mentalist who could mind-read people's cell phone numbers (Connor thought this was a handy skill), and some cheesy-but-energetic stage shows.

Most nights, the boys headed to the teen center after we caught an early show en famille. That was fine with Paul and me. We boogied our way through the ship's various nightclubs. Badly.

• Schedule kissy-face time with each other. We happily club-hopped until the wee (for us) hour of 11 p.m. We also discovered a way to ditch our own teens -- and everyone else's: the adults-only pool area. Ahhh! We grew to love that peaceful spot.

After the first day or so at sea, we got into the rhythm of shipboard life and, wonder of wonders, quit worrying about the kids. We even had some, ahem, romantic moments, and enjoyed other grown-up pleasures, like relaxing in the hot tub and winning a little cash in the casino.

That's when we realized what we like best about cruising -- the happy balance of couple time and family time.

• Let them pick the shore excursions. Did you come all this way to hear your teens moan about going on ''another stupid hike?'' You did not.

Give them the list of shore excursions, clarify your budget, and let 'em have at it. Yes, this means you will be riding dune buggies and banana boats instead of visiting forts, charming villages and duty-free shops, but so be it. You will do things you never thought you'd do, like ultimate power snorkeling, helmet diving and zip-lining through a rain forest.

You will have a fabulous time. So will your kids. And you'll earn loads of street cred simply for agreeing to all this.

Visit your cruise line's website where you can preview shore excursions and pre-book your favorites. We didn't do that, alas, and some activities that sounded great to us were filled by the time we boarded the ship.

• Set the ground rules early. Deal with expenses right away. If your kids are soda drinkers, many ships offer unlimited drink cards you can buy. You can opt not to give them bill-signing power with their cruise cards. Agree beforehand on cell phone use so they don't run up huge roaming charges for calls and text messages.

If the ship's curfew sounds late to you, or your teens are youngish, set your own curfew. This is especially important if you're sharing a cabin and don't want to hear rowdy kids crashing into the room after midnight. Which brings us to . . .

• Opt for as much space as you can afford. Face it, your kids aren't little anymore, and they take up a lot of room. They also hog the bathroom. Splurge on a family suite, or two rooms, instead of sharing a stateroom.

A suite works really well if you're earlier risers, like we are, and your kids like to sleep until noon, like ours do. With two connected rooms, early birds and night owls can co-exist happily, and (bonus) you'll still know when they roll in at night. That super-sensitive parental radar will kick in, even if you're 1,000 miles out to sea.

• Pick the right week. Even if you're Posh and Becks, your kids do not think you're fabulous. They'll spend time with you, sure, but 'round-the-clock togetherness won't cut it. They need to be with their own tribe. To make that happen, pick a vacation week sure to be jam-packed with other teens -- summer vacation, spring break, Easter week, and the week between the Christmas and New Year's holidays. The ship will be more crowded, for sure, but what would you rather have: happy teens or a better shot at a poolside lounge chair?

Also, stick with shorter cruises, a week or so in duration. Longer cruises tend to draw an older crowd. And stick with the less-exotic locations. If you cruise the Baltic, say, or the Mediterranean, you'll get an older, sophisticated crowd, and not as many families. Save the exotic destinations for your vacations à deux. The Caribbean routes are always tops with families.

• Pick a big ship. Everybody sings the praises of the posh little ships. For romantic getaways, sure. But if you're cruising with teens, you want lots of teens. Bigger ships mean more passengers, and bigger, more tricked-out teen centers.

• Savor the small stuff. Some things you just can't plan. We all wandered out to the deck one night and realized the lounge chairs had been covered with blankets, and an almost-first-run film was playing on the ship's giant movie screen. We found four chairs, pulled them together, and watched a movie under the stars, complete with goodies. We had a wonderful, cozy time -- as a family. It doesn't get better than that!